NGUM!

I was listening to one of the "the mrbrown show" podcasts yesterday. One particular episode I'd want to highlight is the part on National Go Up Month - NGUM.

Here's my transcription of the podcast. Mark-natural, Tim-Blue, Kopitiam Uncle- Green

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Eh Tim ah you also terminate your cable subscription ah?

Yalah, cannot tahan what. First 8 dollars, then 15 dollars, now 25 dollars! how to tahan?!

Ya somemore things like world cup must pay extra, and this year, no italian league. Eh let's go and watch the match at the kopitiam ah.
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Eh uncle uncle, two kopi beng pls.

uh ya ya, lai liao lai liao
(sound of glasses trinkling)5 dollar.

Hah? What! how come so much! It used to be only 80 cents.

Sorry hor, we.. have no choice. July is the national go up month.

And what does that have to do with coffee?

Julyyy.. is GST go up, NETS go up, eleticity go up, and cable TV price go up. Other thing also recently go up is bus fare go up, MRT fare go up, post office go up, polyclinic go up, public hospital go up, sugar cane go up, condense milk price go up, milo go up, household thing go up, CBD Parking go up, rental go up, HDB go up, and.. minister salary go up. So... we also have to go up.

Hah? There is national go up month?

ya, we all together go up, then you all just need to one time pain. We follow the gaumen example. Wan to go up must now go up or else eletion time, cannot go up.

You are just doing it because you are the only coffee shop in the area with a big screen TV showing soccer on cable right?

No la, cannot liddis say.. we have no choice! We are not the monopoly you know. We are competing with other coffee shop also what. They got TV also.

Ya, but they are showing the crappy free to air channels.. no soccer!

They got TV, we got TV. They sell kopi, we also sell kopi. Also is competition what. We have no choice..

So that means we have to be paying two dollar fifty cent for a cup of coffee from now on?

no la, we are not so bad.. two-fifty is for the soccer match price. You want the cheaper? Can come and drink during the happpy hour time. Only two dollar! Happy hour time, no soccer. We have no choice.

Drink coffee also got happy hour ah? So expensive! Cannot afford!

Ahhhh, but the economy also go up..! The newspaper keep saying what, so it must be true! Nowsaday, look like eeeeveryone got promotion, increment, and seven month bo-nus. So you all should be able to afford NGUM.

NGUM? (Tim)

National Go Up Month.. (spelling) N G U M - ngum.. we all follow gaumen wan. July ngum ngum ho.. all go up, we have no choice.

I thought you guys promise not to raise coffee prices? I saw the papers that day, a bunch of coffee shop owners promised!

Oh it's true! Our coffee never go up. We got promise we got promise. Go up.. is the cup rental. We have no choice!

Cup rental? What! Now I gotta pay rental to drink your coffee?

Ya, coffee is still same price. Cup rental only go up. Rental now very expensive you know. So the cup ah, also must rental. We have no choice...

And if I want to drink coffee without your cup leh?

Cannnoottt... you have no choice..

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If you haven't listened to the mrbrownshow yet.. do it now! I find it really funny at times, and it also highlights the humourous sides in current affairs of Singapore. Now.. on to the next episode..