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Shaky Shoulders

There are times when humanity looks back at their decisions and wonder whether it was right in the first place. Am I repeating that mistake?

When I first felt the urge to be take on posts of power, there was an aura of determination and confidence all about. That was 5 months back in December. Now, as I write it, I am not writing it with the aforementioned aura. 5 months later, I am nervous.

To understand the situation, I'll have to let you know a bit about my past. Back then, I was a nobody. Ordinary student with academic results at the back of the first class. Never a prefect. Never a librarian. Not a good sportsman either. Substitute for football and basketball games. Only took part in the march past. No society positions. My greatest achievement? Being a committee member in a fund-raiser project in high school, scoring 7As in SPM and ABBac in A-levels.

Now after 19 years, I suddenly felt the need to step up in society. Secretary for the Buddhist Society. Great. Running for the post of Vice President in the Edinburgh Malaysian Students Association. What next? A union post?

Axxu, which happens to be a great person, once told me, it doesn't matter whether you lose or win this election, the difference is that you were bold enough to step up to the challenge. This piece of wisdom, is what keeps me going right now, when I feel like giving up.. like last time. I never ran for posts because I wasn't bold enough, I didn't sign up to be a prefect because I thought I couldn't handle the job. I never even tried.

I am trying now, and I sure as hell am not going to let my weakness show.

P.S: I call upon divine assistance for tomorrow's EMSA AGM, and Monday's Economics exam which I still have 14 chapters to cram. *crosses fingers*